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The Barefoot Preacher's Wife
Check here for the most recent humor columns by Celine Sparks.
Other columns can be found mixed in with her Biblically-based books: Because I Said So; Whatever Happened to Fried Chicken?; How to Train Your Dragon; and If Mama Ain't Happy.


"Of that day and that hour"
© Celine Sparks, 2023 I got mine; how ‘bout you? Yes, I did set the alarm for 5 a.m., throw some sweats on, and head out the door exactly...
Nov 17, 20233 min read
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It's Beginning to Sound a Lot Like Someone Spiked the Eggnog.
© Celine Sparks, 2023 Met my old lover in the grocery store. Who writes a song about that? Apparently, Dan Fogelberg. The plot thickens...
Nov 12, 20233 min read
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This thing wears the living daylights out of me.
© Celine Sparks, 2023 Cheesecake with the accent on the cake part. VIP box seats at the Iron Bowl. Shoes that look good, and feel better...
Nov 6, 20234 min read
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Animal House
© Celine Sparks, 2023 There’s gotta be a better word for them. I’m not sure how the term pets caught on, as if these animals that invade...
Oct 24, 20233 min read
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Kicking & Screaming: They kicked & we screamed.
© Celine Sparks Crimson and orange have always clashed. I’m not sure they’ve figured that out at Virginia Tech yet. But we’ve got a...
Oct 16, 20233 min read
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Fall is for egg-rolls.
© Celine Sparks, 2023 We’ve been pretending the autumn equinox has already happened for three weeks. But there’s just something about...
Sep 19, 20234 min read
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Not gonna argue over a penny. Make it two and I can stand here all day.
“It’s the principle of the thing.” That’s what my mother would say when we would beg, “Mom, it’s two cents. Let’s go home.” But she was...
Aug 31, 20234 min read
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Smoky Mountain Breakdown
© Celine Sparks, 2023 It’s happening again. Each year we go to a church-related workshop in Sevierville, Tennessee, and it’s almost time....
Aug 9, 20233 min read
287 views
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Back to Drool
© Celine Sparks, 2023 I know this seems ridiculous, but we didn’t have backpacks in school. Oh, we knew about ‘em. The Boy Scouts had...
Jul 29, 20233 min read
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Are they really mad, or are they just acting?
© Celine Sparks, 2023 It’s a swing and a miss, and that’s strike 2! The first strike was the one where the writers in Hollywood decided...
Jul 15, 20233 min read
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