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The Barefoot Preacher's Wife
Check here for the most recent humor columns by Celine Sparks.
Other columns can be found mixed in with her Biblically-based books: Because I Said So; Whatever Happened to Fried Chicken?; How to Train Your Dragon; and If Mama Ain't Happy.


Animal House
© Celine Sparks, 2023 There’s gotta be a better word for them. I’m not sure how the term pets caught on, as if these animals that invade...
Oct 24, 20233 min read


Kicking & Screaming: They kicked & we screamed.
© Celine Sparks Crimson and orange have always clashed. I’m not sure they’ve figured that out at Virginia Tech yet. But we’ve got a...
Oct 16, 20233 min read


Fall is for egg-rolls.
© Celine Sparks, 2023 We’ve been pretending the autumn equinox has already happened for three weeks. But there’s just something about...
Sep 19, 20234 min read


Not gonna argue over a penny. Make it two and I can stand here all day.
“It’s the principle of the thing.” That’s what my mother would say when we would beg, “Mom, it’s two cents. Let’s go home.” But she was...
Aug 31, 20234 min read


Smoky Mountain Breakdown
© Celine Sparks, 2023 It’s happening again. Each year we go to a church-related workshop in Sevierville, Tennessee, and it’s almost time....
Aug 9, 20233 min read


Back to Drool
© Celine Sparks, 2023 I know this seems ridiculous, but we didn’t have backpacks in school. Oh, we knew about ‘em. The Boy Scouts had...
Jul 29, 20233 min read


Are they really mad, or are they just acting?
© Celine Sparks, 2023 It’s a swing and a miss, and that’s strike 2! The first strike was the one where the writers in Hollywood decided...
Jul 15, 20233 min read


Cavemen didn't wear name tags.
© Celine Sparks, 2023 Cavemen didn’t wear name tags. I mean, at least the archaeological digs didn’t show any fossil relics of bones with...
Jul 6, 20234 min read


"Now the serpent was more crafty than any beast of the field."
Well, he sure had me beat to pieces! © Celine Sparks, 2023 They always told us the most important word in VBS was Bible. We’ve been...
Jun 15, 20234 min read


I wish I could stop stairing.
© Celine Sparks, 2023 It’s what we do about every 18 months. In the late nineties, I was giving birth at this rate. Now I’m loading up...
Jun 3, 20234 min read
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